I ate yesterday. In my mind that's naughty and I feel really guilty. But, in your mind that's the right thing to do. Anorexia (Ana) is telling me that I did a bad thing and I believe it. I don't know how I'm ever going to recover if I keep believing what Ana tells me to do. I wish my head worked differently. I cried yesterday thinking this act was wrong. If I went back to the day when Ana did not taunt me, I'd be happy I ate yesterday. My mind is telling me to starve today since I ate yesterday. I'm thinking about doing it. If I do it, I'm weak. I pray to God that my being will not let Ana stomp all over it. I'm thinking to myself was this act of eating Naughty or Nice, the fact that my mind is infected with Anorexic Thoughts does not help at all.
AnaLovesNneka
No comments:
Post a Comment